At a 12-step meeting last Sunday, I heard that it is selfish to wish someone behaved differently. This gave me pause for self-reflection. It often happens that I wish people in my life would make different choices. I wish they would adopt healthier habits - better diets, more exercise, avoiding substances that can cause harm. I genuinely want the best for them.
That person might have a reason that you don’t see. Or he/she might be blind. In both cases, acceptance with boundaries is needed.
I'm not sure if this applies to wanting someone you love who is fighting against you. wouldn't you wish that that person stop fighting?