A sense of belonging and on being a Third Culture Kid
When people ask where I’m from, I never know what to say.
Is it where I was born? What if I never lived in the city of my birth?
Is it where I went to middle school? That would make me French, but I don’t have a French passport.
Is it based on my passport? I have two, Swiss and American, and both the Swiss and the Americans see me as a foreigner.
This nagging sense of rootlessness is typical for a Third Culture Kid or a TCK, a term coined by US sociologist Ruth Hill Useem in the 1950s, for children who spend their formative years in places that are not their parents’ homeland.
Studies show TCKs face a variety of challenges including having less emotional stability than those who grew up in more culturally and socially stable environments.
In my case, we moved from Monaco to the USA when I was 10 years old. I never had a chance to say goodbye to my friends. I was switched from an international school to one with mainly Americans. Everyone was in a bubble and not really motivated to be friends with the new girl from Monaco who didn't necessarily understand American fashion and who had a French accent.
Luckily there are advantages to being TCKs. They adapt easily to other cultures, are flexible, able to cope with change, speak more than one language, are well-travelled and have a broader world view.
There is more understanding and counseling help for TCKs now. The importance of marking departures with a celebration and tying up loose ends is recognized as important.
For now, I will continue answering I am from the USA and Switzerland… and from France.